Election Day in the Steel City


Tomorrow is Primary Election Day here in good old Pennsylvania. I hope you registered to vote. It’s important that the collective voice of Steeler Nation is heard. At least, that’s the message I seem to be getting from Democratic front-runners Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama.

Either that or their highly paid, Harvard-educated political operatives have cleverly deduced that the best way to be popular in Pittsburgh is to pander to Steeler fans.

Works for me.

Although, I’m still left with a torturous choice. Do I go with Hillary, who smartly traded her ill-fitting, semi-mannish pantsuits for an always stylish Steeler jersey? Or do I go with the charismatic, chain-smoking Obama?

Hmmm…choices. Jack Lambert was a chain-smoker and he was a great leader on our defense. Plus, Obama not only has the endorsements of Franco Harris (no word on his Italian Army) and Jerome Bettis, but he also made up his own version of the Terrible Towel. Why, it even has his message of optimism and hope printed on it! In your face, Myron Cope!!

Well, whomever you vote for (Obama), I hope you do at least vote (for Obama). You’re very lucky to live in Pittsburgh because besides having the greatest football franchise in the history of the NFL, you also live in the state which is responsible for electing the president of the United States. Okay, us, parts of Ohio, and some old geezers down in Florida. But that’s really about all the true “swing areas” there are left.

‘Tis a fact. Look over the results for the past two general elections and you will see that these were the areas that, if they swung to the other candidate, would’ve tipped the balance of the state to the other side and given them a win according to the all-important Electoral College system.

But don’t just take my word for it. Obviously Republican Presidential Nominee-to-be John McCain is well aware of Pennsylvanias political importance. He’s already decided to one-up both Barack’s towel and Hillary’s jersey with a shrewd political maneuver of his own. Yep, I know who he’s picked to be his Vice President and it is someone who will definitely help him get votes in the Allegheny County area. Perhaps you’ve heard of the gentlemen, I think he once ran for governor: