Big Ben Whipped It Out
By chris
Art Rooney II, current president of the Pittsburgh Steelers, spoke publicly for the first time since his disgraced quarterback learned he would not face sexual assault charges down in Georgia. The key point in the press conference was that the Steelers were prepared to suspend Ben Roethlisberger immediately. However, they will act in conjunction with NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell so that only one mutually agreed upon punishment will be issued. For those hoping for a quick resolution to this sad state of events, the bad news is no decision will be made until after next weekend’s draft.
What I found most interesting about II’s statement wasn’t so much what he said but what could be read between the lines. He apologized to Steeler Nation several times and seemed to clearly be aware of the fact the vast majority of true Steeler fans have turned against their scumbag quarterback. I give him credit for being honest when it came to admitting that if a player was really good, they were going to get more leeway than a guy on the practice squad. But then he went into a pretty evasive explanation for trading Santonio Holmes, who was most definitely an important part of the team.
I was also interested in his answer to the rumors that the Steelers are willing to listen to trade offers for Big Ben. If they were completely false, he would’ve made a declarative statement such as “Ben Roethlisberger is and will be our quarterback.” Instead, he simply said he didn’t discuss potential trades. Now, you could spin that one of two ways. Either he said that to get Ben’s attention and let him know he’s on Double Secret Probation. Or he said it because the rumors are true.
Please let it be so.
In the meantime, DA Fred Bright released all the police reports and witness statements pertaining to the rape alleged rape that his bumbling office couldn’t figure out how to prosecute. By the way, remember how a few days ago I went on a rant about what an inept job those corrupt hayseed cops did down in Milledgeville? Well, it was revealed today that Sergeant Jerry Blash was forced to resign.
Who’s Jerry Blash? Oh, that’s right, this guy:
Not that Pittsburgh police officers are any better. Unless being pimps for your hometown team’s star QB was recently added to the job description. If you’re bored or interested in finding out what a colossal tool Ben Roethlisberger is, you can read all the transcripts from the case by clicking right here. If you don’t feel like slogging through all the sordid details, I suggest you just skim the underlined parts. It’s creepy and disturbing on several thousand different levels. Not the least of which is the fact an off-duty police officer partying/bodyguarding Pig Ben was the one who pulled the drunken victim aside, led her down a hall, then stood guard at the bathroom door while her friends pleaded with him to let them get her out of there. Good job, officer.
It gets even worse. The victim in her statement clearly establishes she told the hulking imbecile “No” on several occasions. Of course, Ben Roethlisberger wasn’t taking no for an answer. In fact, he had his penis out before they even entered the bathroom. How’s that for a visual?
“Hey Deke, see that hot coed over there? The one who’s smashed out of her mind? Yeah, lead her to the back and stand guard. I gotta whip it out.”
What a piece of garbage. That’s your starting quarterback, ladies and gentleman. The man Art Rooney II says wants to earn your trust and respect. He could spend the rest of his time here in Pittsburgh healing AIDS babies, running the ferris wheel at Kennywood, helping the McMutrie sisters care for orphans from Haiti, and cleaning the monkey cages at the Pittsburgh Zoo and I’d still think he’s a lowlife.
In fact, I’d be rooting for the monkeys to bean him with their poo. And if one managed to consistently hit their target (his melon-shaped head), I’d demand the Steelers sign him to be their next quarterback. At least then I could watch their games without feeling dirty.