Steelers put up pitiful display in loss to Patriots

As America’s most beloved black and gold-clad philosopher once opined: good grief. There’s scarcely a more embarrassing scenario for the Pittsburgh Steelers than what played out on national television last night.

They had to watch another team raise the banner to tie their historic Super Bowl record, and then they fall flat on their face on the field and lose by 30. This piece was meant to be a reflection on the Steelers defense’s performance after a 2018 campaign where they showed themselves to be as soft as a baby’s bottom.

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To be sure, there were some unacceptable mistakes on defense. The Patriots lit up the scoreboard first after Joe Haden, and Terrell Edmunds‘ poor tackling could not corral the perpetually suspended Josh Gordon. Edmunds later found himself in trouble again, conspiring with Mike Hilton to get torched on another New England touchdown.

Even when TJ Watt appeared to have Tom Brady sacked late in the game, the 42-year-old still managed to get the ball off to Julian Edelman.

I planned to focus on the defense, and I’d have griped a little but eventually conceded that you can’t judge the unit on a Week 1 performance against an elite receiving corps. Then, however, the offense distinguished itself in the worst way. The Steelers’ offense was simply offensive.

Donte Moncrief was one of the most visibly lacking on the offensive side of the ball. My notes tell the story of self-sabotage better than anything: “MONCRIEF WITH ANOTHER DROP IMMEDIATELY AFTER.” Immediately after what? Shortly after James Washington provided an exceedingly rare glimpse of excitement by hauling in a reception for 33 yards in the fourth quarter.

Ben Roethlisberger seemed absolutely pedestrian, going 27/47 for 276 yards and, surprisingly, only one interception.

James Conner managed 21 yards on 10 carries. JuJu Smith-Schuster, the Steelers’ new WR1, had six receptions for 78 yards. Here’s the carnage from the first half:

All this before things turned simply comical when “everybody except the center” was called for a false start:

Next week brings the Seattle Seahawks to Heinz Field. The black and gold are 3.5 point favorites as of Monday night, and ESPN’s win probability tilts 54%-46% to Pittsburgh. Seattle wasn’t convincing in a 21-20 win over the Bengals, letting Andy Dalton throw for 418 yards.

Week two may offer a bit of a reprieve, but this was still the least amount of fun I’ve had watching a Steelers game in a long time. While clearer skies may be on the way, the question still stands: I’ve been waiting all offseason for a blowout loss like this?